Feeling Loved

Pregnancy as the power to bring out the stupid in the people around you. And by "stupid" I mean that some people just don't think before they speak. They say things like, "Wow, you are HUGE!" as if I don't know I'm very big. Of course I know it - I have to LIVE with this body. And my current favorites (typically heard from co-workers): "Haven't you popped that kid yet??" or "Why are you still here?" Um, where else am I supposed to be? Why wouldn't I be here? And NO, clearly, I haven't "popped the kid" yet, but thanks for reminding me that I'm still stuck hearing comments like these all the time. Sheesh!

But pregnancy also has the power to bring out the best, the kindest, and the most generous in people. Most people love a pregnant woman, and they can't help but smile. And the people who are already in my life - my friends, family, loved ones in general - are the best example of how wonderful this experience is at times. I have been told some of the most wonderful, loving things in the past nine months; been given some of the greatest gifts (tangible and otherwise); and cared for by many as lovingly as my own mother cares for me.

Today I've been making out a list of people we want to contact after the Weeble arrives and putting together their numbers so M can take care of this mighty project while I'm in the hospital. The mail arrived, and with it an unexpected and most precious gift. It got me thinking back on some of the lovely things people have said to and done for me during this process.

Every day, M proves that he is an amazing husband and father-to-be, taking incredible care of me and an endless list of work around the house as I get bigger, more uncomfortable, and more swollen with every day. One day, several months ago, I had sent him out to pick up some groceries and some O'Doul's, the pregnant beer-drinker's staple (hey, it's better than a kick in the head). He returned with warm O'Doul's off the shelf and apologized that he wasn't able to get cold that I could drink immediately. The reason? Only canned O'Doul's was in the coolers, and, as he said, "It’s enough of an insult that you have to drink this stuff, so I wasn’t going to add to it by making you drink it from cans." It's hard to describe why this is so sweet, but the people who know M will understand.

Around Mother's Day this year, a handful of people recognized the day with me, even though I wasn't yet officially a mother. One friend sent an email expressing high admiration for all the mothers she knows, saying she doesn't know how we do it, but she loves that we do. All I could think was how much it meant to me that she thought to put me in that category.

Another good friend sent an email - in response to what I don't remember. But in it she said, "“Not sure if I ever told you before, but… let me say this: you are one of the most attractive people I have ever met and now you are OFFICIALLY one hot mama. Don't forget that." Considering that there have been so very many points during this pregnancy when I have felt decidedly unattractive or hot, this is one thing I've taken with me and held onto during the rough spots.

And then there was my baby shower, put together by two of my dearest friends who went above and beyond to make it a special, relaxing, and fun event. I thanked them both, but I don't know that I could ever show them just how important they are to me and how grateful I am for all they have done for me throughout my pregnancy... not to mention the durations of our friendships.

Just this week, I had breakfast with two dear friends who are among the kindest, most supportive people I know. Later in the day, one of them sent me a note to tell me she thinks I look fantastic, and that I am an inspiration to her. And that she wasn't saying it just because it's probably what I need and want to hear right now. What made it even better was the fact that, of course, it is what I want to hear right now.

And today. The unexpected gift that arrived in the mail from a kindred spirit. I think I'd rather not try to describe it other than to say it is easily one of the most personal, touching gifts anyone could have given me and my child. It's the kind of gift that you won't get from someone who doesn't really, truly love you.

There have been so many other gestures, some big, some small. But all have made my life happier and better. I just don't know how I got so lucky to have so many good people in my life. And as I get closer to "popping the kid out," I realize that she is just as lucky. Because all these people who love and care for me will doubtless do the same for her. Now that is one fortunate little girl.